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The Hope Diary: Step Ten: Taking Daily Inventory
Step ten is the first step that I take daily in order to keep myself in check. When I find that my character or food plan might be getting a bit sloppy, I try to immediately surrender myself to God and ask for His help to renew my mind In Him and take account for exactly where I am going wrong. In doing so, I am able to get back on track much faster and have a fruitful day. In the past before I found strong recovery I just kind of floundered around mercilessly inside and felt very lost. My mind was weak because I had let the eating disorder and other problems control it for many years. Thank God for His Grace and the twelve steps of recovery to bring daily help in every single situation that can arise.
Thank you to The Life Recovery Workbook by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop for the following questions.
Personal Boundaries
Genesis 31:45-55
1. In order to restore trust in relationships, what particular weaknesses do I need to set boundaries around?2. Is there a trusted person to whom I can clearly define my commitments? Who? What commitments am I willing to make?
Repeated Forgiveness
Romans 5:3-5
1. Do certain behaviors and character defects that show up in my Step Ten inventory point to a pattern? Which ones? What is being revealed to me?2. Am I having trouble admitting these promptly and forgiving myself?
3. Do I give myself grace? Why or why not?
Dealing with Anger
Ephesians 4:26-27
1. What is my first response when I am angry? Lashing out? Stuffing down? Avoidance and covering up?2. How was anger dealt with in my family? How did my mother deal with anger? My father? Which pattern do I follow?
3. When I am angry, can I promptly admit it? Why or why not?
4. Do I have support people who can help me learn to deal with anger more appropriately? Am I willing to ask for assistance with this issue?
Spiritual Exercises
1 Timothy 4:7-81. As this continual inventory is important for spiritual fitness, where in my daily routine can I set aside time to make myself self-assessment part of every day?
2. Do I have any resistance to evaluating my defects daily? What are my objections? What do I fear?
3. An example of a simple, daily, personal inventory:
Where have I been selfish, dishonest, fearful, inconsiderate, or proud?
What have I done right today?
What do I need God's help with tomorrow?
What am I grateful for today?
Perseverance
2 Timothy 2:1-81. How do I see my recovery as a war against addiction and as a fight for my soul?
2. How do I see myself as an athlete in training for the marathon journey of recovery and serenity?
3. Am I working in every season and situation? planting seeds of recovery by applying the Twelve Steps to my life?
4. Where do I lose heart in fighting, training, and working through the Twelve Steps?
Looking in the Mirror
James 1:21-251. Have I been quick to recognize but not take action in a particular area of my life or defect of character? If so, I can take action without self-criticism by going back through Steps Six and Seven, then Eight and Nine on that particular area or defect.
2. On what area or defect do I need to take action today? This week? This month?
Recurrent Sins
1 John 1:!-101. Have I hoped for immediate release from my defects as I may have had from my addiction? Have I perhaps unknowingly hoped that by doing all this step work I could attain perfection? Write any thoughts and feelings that arise from reading this meditation:
2. Am I clear that I still need inventories to continue my spiritual growth? In other words, have I developed enough humility to accept that inventories will be a regular part of my journey?
Explain:3. Am I sensing that my conscience is returning or developing so that I more easily recognize my faults? Am I humble enough to admit them more readily? Record any progress you've noticed in your conscience:
God Bless,
Nikki DuBose
“Six Tips on How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You” by Karla Downing
Christian Relationship Help: Six Tips on How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You by Karla Downing
“Forgiveness is a commandment for Christians (Matthew 6:14-15); yet, there is a lot of misunderstanding on how to forgive. This Christian relationship help gives you six tips on how to forgive someone who has hurt you:
1. Understand that it is a process.The first step is to commit to that process. Some people erroneously suggest that someone should forgive right away when they find out about a major offense. This isn’t possible. Before you can forgive, you have to know what you are forgiving. It takes time to figure out what has happened and how it has affected your life.
2. Reflect on the facts of the situation, your reactions, and how it is affecting you. You have to count the cost in order to forgive by first recognizing how you have been affected by the offense. This way you know what you are forgiving.
3. Understand what the offender did and why it was done.This is putting yourself into the shoes of the other person. It gives you a perspective that can help you to be empathetic. Hurt people hurt people. This doesn’t mean you excuse the wrong or not hold the person appropriately accountable; it only means that you try to understand the problems the other person had that would have caused him/her to do what was done.
4. Choose to let go of the right to get revenge.You turn the person over to God and allow him to judge in his way and time (Romans 12:19). This can include allowing the person to face the legal, relational, financial and situational consequences of his/her actions; however, you need to let go of your bitterness and resentment and not take pleasure in the person’s pain and demise.
5. Treat the person with dignity and respect.You want to love your enemies and offer them a cup of cold water, as Jesus suggested (Romans 12:20); yet, you can still set boundaries to protect yourself. This requires that you take a step of faith and treat the person well. When you do it, it will help you to maintain the forgiveness and allow God to work in the person’s life.
6. Choose to no longer be defined by the offense.This is where you integrate the offense into your life as another thing that has happened that you have walked through that God has used to shape and mold you. Your identity is not: “The spouse who was abandoned,” The parent who lost his child,” or “The unloved child.” You have a different perspective that involves acceptance, forgiveness, and faith and a self-image that includes how you have been refined through your life experiences and how God is using it for good.
This Christian relationship help offers you these six tips on how to forgive someone who has hurt you. These tips will enable you to move on from the offense in a way that sets you free and pleases God.”
God Bless,
Nikki